The world has not changed, but I have.
The world seems different because I am different. I was changed in Bali. Freed. Released. Saved. And there is no way to step back into the status quo. So I am creating a new life for myself – inside my soul and in the world. I have given myself permission to be exactly who I am without adjustment or apology. I wish others could join me. But instead, I may have to find a new tribe. A group of warrior misfits with their own naked souls bared with abandon, knowing this is the only way to communicate clearly. A family of spirits who seek to save the world with creativity, love, and compassion.
The girl inside of me is so different from the woman the world sees. I know she's there, but I don’t yet know her heart. I see her in the mirror, hiding behind smiles and society. I hear her in conversations, followed by apologies or self-conscious laughter. I am yearning to set her free. I am learning to accept all that she is. I am inviting her to come out from my skin and interact with the air, the light, the aether. Because she is all that is good and true in me.
She is the untouched child who loves learning and teaching what she knows.
She is the shameless performer who sings and dances for attention and applause.
She is the soft-spoken mother who gently calms and soothes a heartache.
She is the fierce fighter who bares teeth and claws when threatened.
She is the loyal lover who believes, and believes, and believes.
How far from her I have drifted.
I trained her to hide from the the harshness of this world.
How foreign she often seems.
I encouraged her to shield her sensitive heart.
How misunderstood she feels.
I forced her to stay silent.
But her presence, her sensitivity, and her voice are all that was ever needed.
Speak now my child. I am ready to hear you.
Stand tall now my child. I am ready to introduce you.
Feel deeply now my child. I am ready to accept you.
I can see clearly now, You were always enough.